Skipping Christmas

My dear one and I have come to a decision: we will be skipping Christmas this year.

Neither one of us is in the mood to shop, we don't want anything and with all that has happened in the last week, Christmas is the last thing on our minds. We can barely hold it together; I've had several near breakdowns at work and the love of my life has just now returned to his job. With David's death, there is a void that we cannot fill.

Perhaps next year, we will feel a bit more like celebrating. Even so, nothing will truly be the same. There will always be a void, an empty space, both under the Christmas tree and in our souls.

Loss

It happened this past Monday, the 12th. David passed on in his sleep, peacefully.

My dear one is heartsick, as can be expected (this was his brother, after all) and I myself am quite heartbroken.

No one should die at the age of twenty-five.

Christmas is cancelled this year....

Time

As I write this, David is still at home. He's removed the oxygen and is now waiting for the inevitable. He's made it past Thanksgiving, but we're afraid he won't make it to Christmas. If we're lucky, he will. If not, we will probably be attending a funeral.

My dear one and I got a Christmas card from David. It was hard as hell to open, let alone read. I nearly started crying just seeing the envelope. At twenty-five, you shouldn't be worrying about anyone's funeral, let alone your own. I just want to ask, "Why?' Why should someone so young die? Why, when David has just gotten his life together, when he's just gotten everything straight, why should his life end now?

Why? Why God, why?